While Jim was in hospital for nineteen days and is now at home recuperating, I’ve been wearing a lot of hats. Much gets dealt with, some things will just have to wait. Essentials first, then vacuuming, right?

Meanwhile, I’ve noticed an interesting phenomenon that I intend to foster. With so much out of my control, I find myself critically eyeing dubious stuff in my space. Decisions to keep or discard have suddenly become easy. Clearing out small spaces feels good — a tiny sense of being in control of at least something.

When it comes to all the stuff, there is a downside in my commitment to reuse/repurpose. It looks something like this:

“I’ll hang on to this. It might come in handy some day.”

“Oooooo. I know exactly what I could use this for.”

“This is still perfectly good. I’ll keep it for a spare.”

“Just as soon as I throw this away, I’ll need it.”

I have to actively manage this internal conversation. Susceptibility to raw materials is my Achilles heel. Also, not wasting perfectly good stuff … such as extra bedding plants, rootable cuttings, last year’s seeds even though I saved them myself and am growing more this year, attractive jars, tiny bottles, adorable boxes, crinkle packing, interesting paper, cardmaking supplies, and paper bags. Then there are all the materials for my rustic woodland miniatures hobby. You can see how this could get out of control very  quickly.

Have you ever heard of the law of diminishing satisfaction? I came across this concept decades ago. If you’ve ever watched a child opening a lot of gifts, you’ve seen it in action. The first one is so exciting. The next one might be too, but after a few, the satisfaction just isn’t there. And invariably when the last one is unwrapped, the child says, “Is that all?” The problem isn’t an ungrateful child. It’s just that there is too much. Appreciation becomes impossible. We’re still like that. If we’re not on guard, we can fall into the consumer trap of buying something to make us feel better. Actually, getting rid of something is much more effective.

I give myself permission to clear out some space. Our beautiful old hutch is imbued with a strange, synthetic fragrance, no doubt from a candle I unwisely bought, who knows when. I’ll find the culprit. In fact, nothing bad will happen if I downsize my candle collection by sixty percent. Or if I donate these square glass luncheon plates to the thrift store. But I paid good money for them. That was a long time ago, my dear.

The vast amount of stuff we have reminds us of the abundance in our lives. How many pieces of clothing are in our closets? How many duplicate items of any sort? Vases, coffee mugs, sets of dishes, side tables, coffee tables, sound and video equipment, cameras, pairs of shoes and boots? We could go on and on, couldn’t we?

“Taking inventory and care of our possessions provides tangible evidence of the abundance we already enjoy. And gratitude for and attention to our existing abundance is a remarkable antidote to a feeling of lack that is weaponized against us in a capitalist society.” – Ashlee Piper, No New Things

I remember feeling all grumbly one day because I really needed to dust everything in the china cabinet and the wall unit. But wait. Why do I have all those things that need dusting? Do I like them? Do they make my life richer? If yes, then why not cherish them? Enjoy taking each item from the shelf, admiring it, gently stroking it with a soft dustcloth, arranging it back into its place with a little pat. Cleaning this way is appreciating what I have. And anything that doesn’t merit it, well, why not pass it on to someone else who will enjoy it more?

“You’re way less susceptible to feeling not-enough when you’re hyperaware that your home has everything you need to be cozy, comfortable and safe.” – Ashlee Piper, No New Things

My takeaway is this. Sorting, cleaning, repairing and using what we own can be restorative. On the other hand, holding on to stuff that doesn't bring us any satisfaction is a hidden burden. Consciously we may not be aware of it, but we carry it nonetheless. And most importantly, buying new stuff to make ourselves feel better is a hoax.

Our abundance, tangible or intangible, is all around us. And it doesn't depend on stuff.